Issues Under Fire: A Romney Inspired Halloween Tale

Since Halloween is an occasion for telling tales of horror and stories filled with bone chilling terror, we thought we'd threat you to a trick so evil, but for your single vote, could be America's reality in less than six days. We invite you into the mind of the Mad Monster Mitt. (Not pissed off "Mad" mind you, the screwy "Mad!")

Of all the inconsistencies, contradictions and outright lies Mitt Romney has uttered in his run for the While House, we did uncover one particular disturbing theme he's maintained throughout the process. Mitt Romney has always held he wants to establish America as a friendly place to do business. 

Not a bad concept, until you understand what "business friendly" means in the mind of a monster. The horrors of that mind will unfold if America is turned into a wide open town for global business. A place where corporations big and small could have free reign to conduct business without being held to any standard or responsible for any misdeeds. A place where no rules or regulations of any kind would exist to deter the unscrupulous nature of business practices we're being convinced to except. 

Essentially, America would be an accountable free zone for global business. America, the new Sin City for the big boys of business and a Hell of enslavement for workers and consumers. Only a monster could envision a nation with no rules, no regulations, no code enforcement, no warning labels, no warrantees, no guarantees, no expiration dates, no inspection standards, no consumer protection, no refunds, because there are no more receipts. 

In a world of anything goes for profit, Mitt and his ilk will be make obscene profits will little if any downside. If anybody squawks, they can always point to all the new jobs Americans will have. 

Of course, many of those gigs will be of the sweatshop manufacturing with poor ventilation and locked fire exit variety, but when you're being worked like zombies, you'll hardly notice. The investment of maintaining safety in the work place will be a thing of the past. A past when people were still viewed as people. 

If Mitt's monstrous vision is to be realized, meddlesome agencies like the ABC's of big government will have to be eliminated. So what if everything all of a sudden taste like chicken. With no USDA to occasionally stamp the genetically altered meat product, its probably better your meals remain a mystery. 

With no FDA, and and every snake oil account executive will instantly have the cure to whatever ails you. As for side affects, they a merely opportunities to sell another cure. And without an EPA, you'll be able the chew your air one day. 

If nothing above frightens you on this day, just think of what life would be like for Americans struggling on the eastern seaboard after Hurricane Sandy. Monster Mitt would discard FEMA without the blink of an eye, to privatize and commercialize saving lives. We can't think of anything more horrible than that thought for Halloween.

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