The Slacker Vs. The Friday Worker
Like any Friday, staring out of the window, daydreaming about the strangers passing by and the lives they may be living, is always a lame idea. Daydreaming at work is for Monday through Thursday. On Fridays, clever, intelligent, and wise Slackers find ways to slip the shackles and escape to the wonderful world of Goof-off-dom. You don't know what you're missing if you've never been to Goof-off-dom. On the other hand, if you've never been to Goof-off-dom, you're probably one of the Friday workers.
Slackers and Friday workers may as well be separate species. While they might be able to coexist and even cooperate two or three days a week, by Thursday afternoon at the latest, the Slacker will be fed up with the Friday worker. Watching Friday workers keeping their noses to the grindstone when Goof-off-dom is so close can be torturous to a Slacker. Watching the clock only makes it worse.
It wouldn't be so bad if the Friday workers didn't demand the Slackers grind it out with them. If they kept their dirty looks to themselves when they see Slackers slacking at the office, they may be satisfied adjusting their schedules to start coming in late and always leaving the office early. Slackers aren't unreasonable people. To the Slacker, it's the Friday worker who made work a four-letter word.
Goof-off-dom:
Ah, Goof-off-dom, more of a state of mind than anything else. A place where the imagination plays, grows, and reaches out to others of like minds. Rarely will you spend your time in Goof-off-dom, bored and stumped for something cool, fun, and exciting to experience. In Goof-off-dom, you don't have a care in the world because it's all about you and whatever you want to do. Free time and an open mind is all you need for a blissful day in Goof-off-dom.
In Goof-off-dom, simple stuff like a walk in the park, a stroll in the museum, a seat in a movie theater, and having long stimulating conversations is what clever, intelligent, and wise Slackers can do in the middle of the day. True, you could say the lame Friday workers could do these things too occasionally, but they don't. That's what makes them lame Friday workers. And actually, that's a good thing. No self-respecting Slacker wants to see a Friday worker while hanging out in Goo-off-dom.
Imagine running into a Friday worker by accident in Goo-off-dom. That's got to be a Slacker's worst nightmare. How did they get in, you'd wonder? Where did they get the nerve? Being out of their element, the Friday worker likely won't know how to relax in Goof-off-dom, so they'll stick out. Friday workers are always fearful they'll be caught slacking, so they'll most likely check e-mails on their smartphones constantly.
Any experienced Slacker should be able to spot the Friday worker before the Friday worker spots the Slacker. In such instances, the Slacker must think fast and nimbly. This is no time to be too creative with the truth. Stay calm and simply look sad. Actually, the less you say, the better. Let the Friday worker deduce that whatever is ailing you is too difficult to talk about now. With as little chit-chat as possible, as quickly as you can, make a polite and hasty exit.
When you do show up Monday, the experienced Slacker should be prepared. Even the stupidest of Friday workers will put two and two together and realize some of your excuses for being AWOL might be a pack of lies. After all, how could somebody return to work on Monday reporting to have been beheaded last Thursday evening by ISIS, with only a sore throat to show for the experience? Make sure you wear a turtleneck sweater that day. Enjoy your weekend.
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