Billy Bob in Camouflage Vs. The FBI or The Redneck Rebellion of 2016

Billy Bob in Camouflage Vs. The FBI or The Redneck Rebellion of 2016  You Make the Call.

Its funny what a quality tequila can do to one's imagination when one's mind is left idling too long. While awaiting the return of Issues Under Fire, this story about some gun toting redneck "Billy Bobs" taking over the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge in Oregon popped up out of no place. And as it begged for attention, it was difficult to look away. Its not often one gets to see a gathering of committed loons prepared to fight to the death for a cause only clear to themselves. 

After one Cadillac Margarita too many, all I could think about was how cool it would be to see the White trash people go toe to toe with the Federal government. Armed with semi automatic weapons, unreasonable demands and lots of beer, these "America patriots" could setoff the new year with a bang. With the stock market tanking and the North Koreans playing with nukes again, an armed conflict between America's Angry White Loser Class and the American people could provide an interesting diversion. 

At the press conference, the head silly Billy aka Ammon Bundy (no relation to Ted) appeared sensible enough for his first few minutes of face time, but it was clear later on he was the perfect antagonist for this tale. Big stupid and wearing a cowboy hat, Mr. Bundy babbled on about freedom, the constitution, government overreach and all the other stuff the White trash people blather about when they're feeling overwhelmed and overtaken by progress. Finally I thought, we got a live one.  

But sill I wondered, are these retarded rebel rousers the real deal? Are these cow tippers really goofy enough to think they can stand down the United States government? Are they so fanatical they're willing to take up arms against the FBI, the ATF, the Justice Department and Homeland Security? If so, we say lets see it happen. After all, the redneck Billy Bobs have been spoiling for a confrontation with the "government" for decades. We say, let see what they got! 

Actually, this situation is quite thrilling if you think it through. A devotee of conflict such as this observer, want to know if the redneck Billy Bobs in Oregon will call for reinforcements when the government decides the Citizens for Constitutional Freedom has used up its fifteen minutes of fame. Or, will their actions inspire redneck Billy Bobs elsewhere? What if the redneck Billy Bobs in places like Mississippi, Georgia, the Carolinas, Texas and other hotbeds of The White trash people strike out in sympathy for their Billy Bob brethren under siege. That could be interesting. 

Perhaps the White trash people's time has come. Perhaps they've finally been pushed too far and can't take it anymore. Perhaps 2016 is the year they make their move. They've got stock piles of guns, ammunition and bibles. They've got an army of delusional camouflaged Billy Bobs awaiting instructions. They've even got God on their side. The White trash people have everything they feel they need to fight a war against their government.  

Thankfully the redneck Billy Bobs don't have common sense, because we all know how this situation is going to end. It ends with handcuffs, perp walks, jail time and heavy fines. Unfortunately, when you get right down to it, these are nothing but lost rebels trying to define a cause. But since half the fun is watching the redneck Billy Bobs realize when its too late how their situation ends, we say lets get it on! 

BTW, we didn't forget your daily dose of Box 13, as its ready to roll just below. Alan Ladd as Dan Holiday is answering a call from a damsel in distress. Unfortunately, it's a call he'd live to regret. Enjoy and share the misfortune.